Things I never thought I'd say

Discussion in 'The Hens' Nest' started by Rico Suave, Apr 25, 2017.

  1. allmaple

    allmaple Chicken

    "No I do not want a kiss right now, your nose was just in Penny's butt!"

    This was said to Vixen and not J, in case that wasn't obvious :lol:
  2. Rico Suave

    Rico Suave Chicken

    Seriously hoping this isn't I have to say to my children in the future...
    RoryGilmore likes this.
  3. TaterTot

    TaterTot Rulebitch

    LOL. Or as my sister says, “This is how I get pink eye.”
  4. Fitz

    Fitz Leslie Knope Monster

    "Here. Play with your pants."

    (To C, trying to distract him on the changing table).
  5. fantasynerd

    fantasynerd Extra Extra

    :lol: I used to say variations of that all the time at my last job, for the same reason.
  6. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    “Yes, mama’s pooping, now mama wipes her bottom, now we flush, now mama washes her hands!”

    I never thought I’d narrate my pooping process with such an eager audience.
  7. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    I’ve done this enough that I made up a “dancing pants” song.
    April Ludgate, fantasynerd and Fitz like this.
  8. "No...'titular' is not a dirty word."
    Tumnus likes this.
  9. ClamJam

    ClamJam Chicken

    "Sorry sweetie, you cannot nurse and suck your thumb at the same time. That's what we call an opportunity cost."
  10. DaleBrennan

    DaleBrennan Chicken

    "No, no, no, we don't run trains on Rosie"
  11. whatchyagonnado

    whatchyagonnado Chicken

    C does this too! He veryyyy slowly tries to slide his finger (or sometimes mine if hes holding mine) toward his mouth and sneak it in like I won’t notice
    Fitz, April Ludgate and ClamJam like this.
  12. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    “You totally have a bug up your butt about this.”
    Something I’ve said before to him, but never in the context of him deciding we need a Japanese maple NOW.

    Also, impulse buys I never expected: a tree
  13. Honey

    Honey Historian Staff Member

    Wait, was it Fry or your rooster insisting on a Japanese maple?
    A. Ham likes this.
  14. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    Rooster. Fry is maple neutral.
    Fitz and April Ludgate like this.
  15. nym711

    nym711 THIS IS MY LIFE NOW

    Bacon, stop licking up my breast milk!

    I spilled 2 ounces too :cry:
  16. hallokween

    hallokween Chicken

  17. megatron

    megatron Wordsmith Staff Member

    Noooo! :cry:
  18. Apples&Oranges

    Apples&Oranges Chicken

  19. Fitz

    Fitz Leslie Knope Monster

    UGH that is so sad.
  20. deet

    deet Chicken

    I feel like more context is needed for that @nym711 :lol: my initial visual was not pleasant.
    cupcake cray cray and Kimmers like this.
  21. Tumnus

    Tumnus Chicken

    Sorry Nym :sad:.
  22. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    At a ballet performance:
    “She was impressively insectlike.”
    It was ant-themed choreography, and I said this as a genuine compliment.
    Social Piranha likes this.
  23. Social Piranha

    Social Piranha Potatoes

    Who the hell did that to you (after my kid shaved his head). He was wearing a black and white shirt and I asked him if he was joining the Aryan Brotherhood I'm happy t say the hair grew back. Not as quickly as I hoped, bu-tit's back.

    I told myself early on hair and clothes were hills not worth dying on, but that tested my patience.
  24. RoryGilmore

    RoryGilmore Chicken

    “We don’t throw yogurt at the dog.”
  25. Canaligator

    Canaligator Barbie Police

    Meanwhile the dog is like "um, maybe we do mom? Yogurt is tasty!"