Discussion in 'Free Range' started by Honey, Mar 8, 2016.
Who thinks in their brain “Imma tell that stranger I will gobble her up”????
Only acceptable if the stranger is a doggo. Sorry ZL.
I forgot the context and got really worried, because I've definitely told multiple chickens I wanna gobble up their babies because they're so cute, but scrolling up I feel less bad because it's sooo different.
2 kids are on the train with their mom, around 8ish years old Id guess. One is in a foul mood and complaining to his mom "you made us walk all the way over here for nothing. I never want to take the train and the bus again. Only the taxi." The other one, in a better mood, adds in "the taxi smells bad. It makes me want to throw up."
“And that’s the last time I got thrown out of a liquor store!”
Thing 1: ugh how can you eat that salad?? The dressing just makes it way too sweet.
Thing 2: I know! It's a great salad otherwise, but I only use like half the dressing. It's almost too dry.
Meanwhile, I'm eating the exact same salad, laughing. Y'all - the dressing is separate, and you can choose a different flavor than what is supposed to go with it.
“CrossFit my ass!!” (Our restaurant owner friend, describing how he was unable to push his car into a spot.)
The guy in front of me at the grocery store was trying to buy a newspaper. The teenager ringing him up goes “Are you buying this?” Then when he said yes said “where did you get it?!” She then had to have someone come show her where the barcode was to ring it up.
Favorite thing overheard from this therapy office:
(yelled) BECAUSE YOU’RE AN EMOTIONAL AMOEBA.