Kids say the darnedest things

Discussion in 'The Hens' Nest' started by CoolWife, Aug 3, 2017.

  1. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    Fry had an evaluation today. One prompt was to take a doll and throw her a birthday party with play dough cake and then put her to bed.
    Doctor: “The baby wants to go to bed now, she’s sleepy!”
    Fry: “No. The baby wants cake.”
    “No, the baby wants to sleep.”
    “No. The baby wants cake.”

    I don’t think he’s wrong.
    Fitz, shiba shake, TaterTot and 14 others like this.
  2. CoolWife

    CoolWife Chicken

    Seems there are bats living near our new house too (yay!). Saw some flitting about the other night and showed C, who thinks it's super cool too. Then last night we get home from dinner with the IL's super late, so it's dark out.
    C: Let's look for bats!
    Me: Well, it's really late, they might not be out still. Bats come out when it's half-dark and we can see them.
    C: But bats come out when butts glow!
    Me: What.
    C: The bugs whose butts light up!
    Me: Oh. Lightning bugs!
    C: Yeah! Look, glow butt!
    Afishwish, Tumnus, Roo and 14 others like this.
  3. TaterTot

    TaterTot Rulebitch

    At a water park, watching M describe me to a stranger when she didn’t know I was watching her (she wasn’t terrified, just making chit chat with another mom):

    Other Mom: What kind of suit is your mommy wearing? One piece? Or two pieces?
    M: Underwear on the bottom. Boobies on top.
    Pickles, Afishwish, Tumnus and 21 others like this.
  4. CoolWife

    CoolWife Chicken

    D installed a motion switch in the mud room a couple nights ago.
    C this morning walking in there to get his shoes, as the light turns on: “thank you light!”
    Roo, Fitz, shiba shake and 14 others like this.
  5. Tumnus

    Tumnus Chicken

    Gah C, <3
    CoolWife likes this.
  6. Tumnus

    Tumnus Chicken

    I heard a loud thud from the living room.
    Me: "What are you climbing on?"
    S: "Anything"
    Me: "What?"
    S: "Anything"
    Me: You mean "nothing"?
    S: Yeah, nothing!

    He's a really bad liar :lol:
  7. deet

    deet Chicken

    I can't even type the entire convo out, because it was so long, but this morning before school, G asked me if T-Rex's are nice and if he can go see them at the zoo. My dumb ass tried to kidsplain the concept of extinction, and long story short it's 45 minutes of my life I will never get back.

    "Yes they're nice and you can see them at the zoo" was the right answer.
  8. TaterTot

    TaterTot Rulebitch

    Those are my favorite questions now, though, when J asks if something is "real" . . . meaning does it exist today.
    hallokween, Afishwish, Tumnus and 6 others like this.
  9. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    Tumnus and deet like this.
  10. CoolWife

    CoolWife Chicken

    I’ll wait for the glow in the dark unicorn.
  11. Afishwish

    Afishwish Bramblebutt

    Rooster was eating a slice of cake and gave Fry a bite. He clearly wanted more.
    Rooster: “Say ‘daddy, may I have another bite of cake please?’”.
    Fry: “Daddy, may I have the rest of the cake please?”
    Lh718, deet, hallokween and 27 others like this.
  12. virgo

    virgo Chicken

  13. shakespeer

    shakespeer Basic Pirate Lesbian Aesthete

    One of us. One of us.
  14. whatchyagonnado

    whatchyagonnado Chicken

    I came upstairs to kiss C goodnight and he said

    Baby! Baby!

    I said “Do you want me to take you to say goodnight to the baby?” And he said MHMMMMM

    I took him downstairs to where J was in the pack n’ play bassinet and I leaned him in and gave him a kiss on the head :loveu:
  15. Kimmers

    Kimmers Chicken

    Excuse me, after hearing this I need another baby immediately. :loveu:
  16. Fitz

    Fitz Leslie Knope Monster

    My dad, sister's fiance, and B went fishing yesterday afternoon, and B caught the only fish. They brought it home and grilled it (had a bunch of filets, and the head separate). C was enthralled and kept wanting to show everyone the "fishie!"

    "Pops! Fishie!" Ran to the grill to show my dad the fish cooking.

    "Mommy! Fishie!" Brought me to the grill to show me the fish.
  17. deet

    deet Chicken

    G told me M can never get bigger because he's supposed to always be his baby.
  18. Tumnus

    Tumnus Chicken

  19. Comet

    Comet Instigator

    Perfect gif is perfect @Tumnus.
    MagnificentCat, Tumnus and Chevere like this.
  20. RoryGilmore

    RoryGilmore Chicken

    @Tumnus Seriously. Saving that for future use.
    Tumnus likes this.
  21. Lucyinthesky

    Lucyinthesky Chicken

    B did some dog sitting for a family friend and she dropped off a cheque for him today. He turned it around in his hands and said, do I turn this into money??
    Kids these days.
    ClamJam, Afishwish, Roo and 16 others like this.
  22. Apples&Oranges

    Apples&Oranges Chicken

  23. Fitz

    Fitz Leslie Knope Monster

  24. Pickles

    Pickles Chicken

    Yesterday while I was putting my makeup on, M wanted me to come with him in the bathroom while he pooped.

    So I get my BB cream on my face in blobs and then he tells me he needs a wipe so I stop and bend down to him.
    He touched my face so tenderly, looks me dead in the eye so concerned and goes, “butter?”

    My child thinks I put butter on my face.
    Roo, virgo, ClamJam and 19 others like this.
  25. hallokween

    hallokween Chicken

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