Budgeting Shit

Discussion in 'Free Range' started by Vespidae, Jul 9, 2015.

  1. @Fitz He wants me to be jealous. When the split was imminent, he wanted me to move into that house as though a big house would solve our problems. It’s an older house in a regular middle class neighborhood that has had a second story added on as well as an apartment. It has no yard and no flow. It’s just a mishmash of house that won’t sell because it’s overbuilt for the neighborhood and tacky as heck. Guess I’m missing out.
     
  2. virgo

    virgo Chicken

    I use Credit Karma but Discover gives me my FICO score. I feel like there’s another card that does that too. Ryan had terrible credit when we first started dating. I helped him clean it up and, once we were serious, added him to a few of my cards to help bump up his score. 10 years later and our scores are almost identical so yay for that.
     
  3. Apples&Oranges

    Apples&Oranges Chicken

    I can get my credit score from my discover card and my Amazon prime Visa card.
     
  4. virgo

    virgo Chicken

    Ok so I ended up doing a balance transfer to a card with 0% for 12 months. That will really help get our debt down. We had some recurring charges that went on the CC so I changed them to come out of the checking account (Ben’s food and my pilates classes). I feel like I finally have a good handle on our budget and I’m not as stressed out about it. Now I’m just impatient and want to get it paid down as quickly as possible since we’re going to need to move soon. We really need to be able to afford more in rent than what we can now. There’s only a few places on the market right now and they’re not going to work. :sad:
     
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  5. Apples&Oranges

    Apples&Oranges Chicken

    liking for less stressful, more manageable finances! Sorry about the rent. I know that struggle all too well.
     
    virgo likes this.
  6. LouiseBelcher

    LouiseBelcher spampants

    We did the transfer to 0% card last year and it really helped us pay everything down (except for my god awful student loans). We did it to get our payments consolidated and lower the interest but also so we could afford car payments when it became clear we'd have two payments. We have a couple of other cards still- one through our credit union that has a super low rate and we use for emergencies or unexpected expenses (thing that we can pay off within a month or so) like vet bills, and one that is a mileage earning card so we use it occasionally when there is a double mile promotion- again for things we can pay off quickly. We have an amazon card purely for the points and I think it is paid off at this time. I think we last used it for the holidays last year. Of course, in an emergency like a hurricane evacuation or whatever, we can use any of the cards if we need to and that is a good thing but we do try to just use cash.
     
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  7. Kimmers

    Kimmers Chicken

    Since N’s nephew passed away this summer, his mom is unhappy living in her house alone (he lived with her). She’s thinking of moving in with her sister and has asked N if we would like to rent her house from her until we’re ready to buy one. I have so many conflicted feelings about this and I’d love some chicken thoughts. I’m sorry for the novel ahead!

    PRO:
    -Huge financial savings for us, like we would pay a little over $7,000 per year less in rent. Which would help us pay off our (admittedly large) debt much faster. Important because we want to do IVF again maybe as soon as next year, and we both (and N especially) want to buy a house soon. N is really fixated on L having a steady home to grow up and make memories in. He didn’t have the best childhood so I think he’s overly fixated on *where* she lives (L doesn’t care that we rent!) but I do respect his feelings. And I’d love to buy a house too, in many ways I don’t mind renting but aspects of it are shitty too. If we DON’T move, our current budget/plan has us buying a house in about 3.5 years, barring any huge expenses between now and then. This would cut that timeline way down while making our budget less tight in the meantime.

    -N has been really down about money lately and it’s affecting him in a way that makes me worry a bit. Just in the sense that that his overall stress is too high because he’s always dwelling on money and wishing we could buy a house soon etc. We have a budget and a payoff plan we’ve come up with but it’s tight enough that we have to consider every purchase and that is hard. And pretty much every month some extra expense or two comes up and puts us right at the edge of staying within the budget. N basically flinches every time he opens the mail at this point. I know that if I agreed to this move it would take a huge load off his shoulders and he would immediately be so much less stressed. Part of me feels like I should do this even if I have some reservations about it, for him.

    CON:
    -Her house is not in the best area, but I’m conflicted on how much of my feeling that way is just me being a snob versus is it actually unsafe? Like it’s in the worst part of town but part of me is like, is any part of this particular town actually unsafe? If a 5 minute drive can take you to a really nice area were you ever actually in a bad one?

    -MIL was a heavy smoker for years, and our nephew was too. I’m concerned about third hand smoke especially for L. N says that MIL has said she will fix up the house for us because she would be doing so anyway when she wants to sell. He mentioned tearing out the carpets (only 2 rooms are carpeted anyway) and repainting all the rooms with a KILZ primer. I’m not sure what else might be done if anything. But the house hasn’t been renovated in years so cabinets, etc are really old. Do I need to worry that they (and the walls, wood trim, etc.) are saturated with smoke too? I might be overly paranoid about this because my grandmother was my daycare growing up, and she was a smoker, and my brother and I both have shitty lungs. I have mild asthma and I get bronchitis at the drop of a hat. I would hate myself if I put L into an unhealthy environment.

    -MIL is retiring to be our in-home daycare for L which I am hugely grateful for. But that means she will already be around a ton which I know will be an adjustment for me (not because of her, I’m just super into my alone time so the thought of ANYONE being around so much is a little scary). Will I feel like I’m in her space all the time and it’s her house and not our home, even though we pay rent?

    -We are in a lease ourselves which ends March 2020. So this might not even be possible. N feels that it is worth asking our landlord if we can break the lease if we/he finds a new tenant.

    -The house we rent now is really nice and was recently renovated with all new cabinets, new appliances, granite counters, big center island in the kitchen, updated bathrooms, brand new deck, etc. In MIL’s house everything is really outdated and kind of run down. Old wooden cabinets, old appliances, the yard is kind of a mess, etc. I almost didn’t include this bullet point because it’s so superficial but there you go. I’m not great at visualizing things so maybe tearing out the old carpets, repainting all the rooms, and filling the house with our furniture and “things” would make a significant difference?

    Relevant info: I love my MIL, we get along great and I have less than zero concerns about her as our landlord. I think she is offering this partly because while she doesn’t want to live there alone, thinking of selling the house is too painful for her right now so this buys her some time while her grief is still fresh... and partly because she loves us (and freaking adores L) and knows we’d like to buy a house, and this is her way of helping. Also we would be paying the full mortgage amount plus taxes. (And obviously utilities, I just mean that we’d be covering all expenses.)
     
  8. amonavis

    amonavis Chicken

    The only sticking point for me would be the smoke. Could you find a company that does cleaning geared towards getting rid of cigarette smoke and get an idea of what would need to be done and the cost?

    If your current plan puts you at buying a house in 3.5 years and this would cut it down to 1-2 years, you can put up with all the other negatives for that amount of time.
     
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  9. virgo

    virgo Chicken

    It would be hard for me to give up the remodeled place because we’ve only ever had old stuff but if it meant being able to buy a house in 1-2 years then I’d do it. I think it’s worth talking to your landlord about getting out of the lease.
     
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  10. Kimmers

    Kimmers Chicken

    I asked N to rework our budget to see what happens to our house buying timeline if we make this move... maybe seeing that in black and white will help push me one way or the other.

    I know this is silly but also our landlord is the absolute nicest guy and I feel like such a jerk even considering asking him about getting out of our lease early, ugh. He just recently offered to convert our fireplace to gas for next winter because he thought it would be safer for L.
     
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  11. CoolWife

    CoolWife Chicken

    To be 100% honest it sounds like a total nightmare scenario for me. BUT. Butbutbut. A year or even two is like, no time. And if it makes it easier on N or to start IVF again...
     
  12. Apples&Oranges

    Apples&Oranges Chicken

    I think knowing that its temporary would be helpful to me. Our renting situation is that we are friends with the landlord (long time high school buddy of J's) and so far it has worked out well in the 3 years we have been here. It's been beneficial for us all. It's not family of course, but it sounds like your MIL is a really great, laid back person. For a temporary thing that allows you to accomplish such big important things like IVF and buying a house, it might be worth it.
     
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  13. ClamJam

    ClamJam Chicken

    If you do it, please get a signed lease.

    I think you will always feel like you're in her space, and she will possibly act that way, too. What are the odds that she tries to move back in because she has a falling out with her sister, or it will be more "convenient" for her to provide child care that way?

    It may cost thousands to break the lease, move, and make the updates necessary to make the space liveable.
     
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  14. megatron

    megatron Wordsmith

    I think it sounds great in theory, to open up some room in the budget and save to get a house sooner or start IVF again. BUT I also see things going badly with the whole fact that it’s still her house and therefore her space. Plus if she’s your in-home caregiver, then she’s still going to be almost living there, so really is it going to feel like your home? Is she moving ALL of her stuff out, or just clearing out the bedrooms for you guys? I guess if it’s only a year or two and you think you can live with that, then great. But I would honestly consider exactly how much you would be saving (including potential costs of breaking your current lease early) vs the toll it could take on you emotionally/mentally. It might not really be enough to make it worthwhile - or maybe it will! I would do the math first before deciding.
     
  15. Kimmers

    Kimmers Chicken

    I will say that I’m not at all sure I’m willing to do it regardless but I definitely wouldn’t do it if she wasn’t clearing all of her belongings out prior to us moving in. I’m not about to get a storage unit for my own stuff and I wouldn’t want any smoke saturated furniture where I’m living. I wouldn’t do it if we incurred much cost to break our own lease either. In order for me to think about doing this it has to be financially really worthwhile.
     
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  16. LouiseBelcher

    LouiseBelcher spampants

    I once flipped a house that had been owned by a heavy smoker. I tore out the trim, baseboards, carpets and other flooring, cabinets and even the interior doors. I had the ceiling scraped and all the walls and trim painted with killz then this odor reducing paint additive. It was literally a new house when it was done but I still felt like there was a lingering odor. I have horrible asthma so I'm super sensitive to smoke so maybe it was just me. When I sold it no one said anything. The point is, it took ALOT to get the odor out. The walls and trim were yellow, even the appliances and kitchen were coated so I just replaced it all. It was like a sticky layer that was super hard to get off. Before we painted, we used TSP to try to prep the surfaces and the water was just disgusting. It can be a lot of work and expense so I would definitely figure that into the plans.
     
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  17. Kimmers

    Kimmers Chicken

    I think we’ve decided not to make the move. (THANK YOU BABY JESUS) N did some math and it’s not going to make a huge difference to our timeline, once you factor in moving costs etc. The layout of the house would also leave us without a guest room, and our home office would be right next door to our living room, which I think would be tough with MIL watching L. In our current place, the living room and L’s room are both downstairs and our office is upstairs, so there’s some separation. And I did some research on the smoke and I’m worried that really getting rid of it will be more expense and effort than MIL may be planning to spend.

    I feel pretty relieved. I also think there’s a chance that other ways of shortening our timeline may come up over the next couple years. I’ll be looking for a new role at work when I go back next month and hopefully that will come with a salary increase. Our current budget also doesn’t take into account annual raises (we get bonuses too but that’s our vacation fund). And N’s best friend owns a concession business locally, and he’s always offering to let N sell beer at events if he wants some extra cash. N just did a couple of those and the money wasn’t bad... if he did a few of those here and there he could throw that extra cash at our debt or into a savings account to start working on a down payment.

    I’m very much a “things will work out” person so I may be overly optimistic but I’m still happy we are staying put. And it was N’s decision!
     
  18. scotchbutter

    scotchbutter Chicken

    Sounds like you’ve made the right call!
     
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  19. MagnificentCat

    MagnificentCat Chicken

    Great news!

    It was a sweet offer but the last thing to take on at this point.
     
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  20. Canaligator

    Canaligator Barbie Police

    I am happy you are staying put too! Our former next door neighbor was a heavy smoker. Our current neighbors bought her unit after she passed away and they had to literally gut the place down to the studs to get rid of the smoke.
     
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  21. yesmaster

    yesmaster North of the Boarder

    I'm doing a no-spend Monday/Tuesday. Anyone want to join?

    TG and I need to get a few small grocery items on Wednesday but otherwise I don't need to spend anything before my next paycheque on Thursday. I have a tank full of gas, food in the fridge, lunches made for the week and a keurig at work. In theory, this should be a pretty easy task.
     
  22. Vespidae

    Vespidae Antagonist Staff Member

    Ugh, I wish I could. I've been seriously restricting my spending, I have some catching up to do this year. But then of course I chub-rubbed through both of my everyday pants (wtf) and now I have to blow half my clothing budget for the year only three weeks into January. FML.
     
  23. Comet

    Comet Chicken

    I'm in for tomorrow. I have to pay for yoga tonight, but otherwise should be able to avoid spending today too.
     
  24. DaleBrennan

    DaleBrennan Chicken

  25. DaleBrennan

    DaleBrennan Chicken

    Andd I'm out, lol. Ran out of diapers and crackers (cue toddler meltdown).
     

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